My mom

My mom passed into eternity Monday, December 10th at about 3:30 in the afternoon.
She fell asleep on Sunday morning and they couldn't wake her. She was still breathing until 3 something.
She was in my sister Jeannie's home and she died in a peaceful way.

I'm going to put in a few of the last letters Jeannie wrote as updates:

Mom hasn’t awakened, even when we try, since 9:30 a.m. on Sunday. She is gurgling when she breathes, which is very difficult to hear. The CNA tried to turn her a little; she didn’t think it would help. She also didn’t think mom would ever come out of this, but she said the nurse might shed some light on it. She said it looks as if mom could go at any time, but then again, it could take a week. She didn’t know. The nurse isn’t coming until this afternoon. I will send another update.
Mom has had no medication or drugs of any type since 9:50 PM when I administered it to her drop by drop. At this point, I am too concerned that she would inhale it. The reason for the drugs was to help calm her to keep her in bed…which will not be a concern any more. She is also most likely too weak to try to get out of bed if she does awaken.
Jeannie

"Mom stopped breathing about 30 minutes ago. She is still warm, but when I described her symptoms to the Hospice people, the LVN thinks she has passed. They are sending an RN out with the Chaplain. Jim is here; David is here. I can’t find a pulse, but I’m not sure. I can’t hear any heart beating. I don’t feel breath. She was breathing very loudly for the last 20 hrs. or so and then it stopped."

That was a very hard letter to read. I suppose I was expecting it all day as I had talked to Jeannie that morning. Mishael was here when I read it and I was so thankful. Jeannie and I then talked on the phone after she was sure.

Here's another letter from Jeannie she wrote after:
**I would like to share a few strange things that happened in mom’s passing that we find interesting.
When Mom stopped breathing, I tried to reach Jim and couldn’t. I really wanted him here. Jennifer was doing her day care, so couldn’t get here and wasn’t really thinking there was a necessity at that time.
Mary Sasser (Jeannie's mother in law) later that evening told me that she was taking an afternoon nap and wanted to know approx. what time all of this was taking place. She said she had a dream where she was calling out to Jim and Jennifer to get to Jeannie. I ended up finally reaching Jim; he came right over. Jennifer called the mom of the children and made arrangements to come saying that she had a strange feeling that she really needed to come.

During the time before mom passed, she told Lucia that 2 police officers came, but don’t worry no one was arrested; everything was OK. We passed this off as perhaps hallucinations caused from pain meds or something. Yesterday afternoon while we were in the living room with Mom waiting for the funeral home to pick up her body, 2 police officers walked up the courtyard looking for an older lady that had moved the day before. Her family was worried about her. They came into my home asking if I had her phone number or any information. This is very interesting to me because of the ‘veil’ between worlds and understanding that there is no time away from our universe. She was seeing things that hadn’t happened yet. Very weird and interesting.

Another time she had cried out "help me, please" and was reaching for the ceiling. I assumed she was calling me to help her. I wonder now if she may have been asking someone on the other side of the veil to help her. During this time, she looked at me and said “oh, you can’t see what I see.”

My very precious and dear mom, will now get to be with Jesus for eternity. she has run a good race and finished the course. I'm so thankful for her, but right now it's hard to be happy. Everything seems to hurt so much. I've done a lot of crying these last couple weeks.
It's strange as a midwife, mother and daughter how we see the whole spectrum of life (on this earth that is) Birth into this world, the process of growing up and then being born again, and now death. Just Sunday I was part of bringing a life into the world, and then Monday I was part of seeing my mom go into another world.
We were with her just a couple of weeks ago talking about how she learned to skate, how she learned to drive, about her bedroom growing up, her wedding, her births. It wasn't that long ago that she was having babies, teen agers, grandchildren. Life seems long at times, but it's really a short time. How many years do we have left on this earth. 20, 30, maybe 40 or 50? It's not long. Just look how fast the last couple of years zipped by. It just seems like yesterday I was having babies. Now my babies are in their 20's!

Another thing I noticed is how much similarity there is in birth, being born again, and death.
During birth you go through labor. It starts out pretty easy, you can handle it, then it gets harder and at times you want to panic or run. You say "I can't do this" Then you again surrender to another contraction and relax and you do it, you get through, God helps you. Then there is the final pushing stages, some of the hardest work you'll ever do. But this is the final part, and then you hear your baby cry.......and it's all worth it.
Then you have teen agers. When children are little they listen to what you say, they believe what you say, they forgive your mistakes. Then they become teen agers, and they question what you say, they don't understand how you can make mistakes, and they don't know what they believe anymore! Again we have to go through "labor" while they are born again. During this process, that can last years instead of hours, we sometimes can't handle it, sometimes we feel out of control, sometimes we panic and want to run from the pain (pain caused from them not caring or just watching them make foolish mistakes) Or we want to kick the "pain" out of the house, lol. But then there is the "birth" and they grow up and become our best and closest friends. After a few years I don't even remember the hard times.
Now I have watched someone die. This part I hadn't seen before. I was young when my Dad died and I wasn't affected deeply in the same way.
But death also has a labor, panic and birth to it. First Mom was just peaceful and slow. beginning to not care about life on earth. Then there was the agitation, "I have to get out of here" times. Trying to get out of bed and run. Then there was the birth, into eternal life.
Sitting with her those days, was so much like sitting with a laboring women. It was very natural to be the care giver. In fact Martha is so much the Doula and I the midwife in personality. Martha can sit with someone and do nothing but comfort. I so often have to be doing something. Helping, writing, sorting, asking her history, even dumping commodes.
So the Lord has brought us through another big part of life: death. I wonder what he will teach us next.